Tuesday, February 19, 2013

The Plight of a Perpetual People Pleaser

This picture made me laugh out loud. 

I Bekah....am a perpetual people pleaser.

I have lived in this vicious cycle for...oh let's see....I'll be 30 in August so.....I don't know, 25 years?

I can't imagine I was like this before I was 5 or else I wouldn't hear all those stories from my mom about what a stinker I was.
Now I don't know if I could believe that adorable little girl was a stinker...but if I was,I blame the Diet Pepsi that was peddled out to me at such a wee age!

My friend told me about this picture, and we had a good laugh over it,but really.... it's SO TRUE!!!

I have found myself in those rare moments when I say "No, I'm sorry I can't do that...." I quickly follow it up with "I mean unless you can't find anyone else, then I'll do it, I don't want you to be stressed out!"

Though by accepting said assignment, I am momentarily forgetting that I:

  •  now home-school my munchkins
  •  am part of a home-school group that sets up field trips etc
  •  sing on the worship team at my church
  •  (at the moment) am also on the PTSO board at my youngest son's school
 and that's not adding in extras like: family dinners 
and oh I don't know MOTHERHOOD in general. ;0)

But as I near my thirties, I find myself trying very hard to focus on my core.

My faith.

Will I let my foundation be shaken by the world?

 For am I now seeking the approval of man, or of God? Or am I trying to please man? If I were still trying to please man, I would not be a servant of Christ.~Galatians 1:10 

That one socked me in the gut when I was reading my devotional.

Do I care so much about what some may say about my beliefs and my faith, that I'll either silence myself in their midst or tiptoe around issues because I'm scared of the inevitable "your being judgmental".

I'm not saying I'm going on a warpath after all who disagree or would like to twist around the Word to suit them. That's not my style, yo!

 Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.
  For by the grace given to me I say to everyone among you not to think of himself more highly than he ought to think, but to think with sober judgment, each according to the measure of faith that God has assigned.

Romans 12:2-3

My family.

Will I let my home suffer because I can't say no despite my sometimes hectic schedule?

Or will I respect my husband? By speaking his love language of quality time and "sacrificing"that part of me that really hopes the people I said "no" to don't think that I'm a flake.

 An excellent wife who can find?
    She is far more precious than jewels.
  The heart of her husband trusts in her,
    and he will have no lack of gain.

 Proverbs 31:10-11

My Friends.

Will I let seemingly silly disagreements among us, separate us?

I am always trying to tow the line with friends and make sure that everyone feels loved and appreciated.
But I must say that there are times when it feels as though that quality is taken for granted.
I desire for everyone to get along, though I know that the more opposing personalities you try to fit into a room, the harder that is to achieve.

The beginning of strife is like letting out water,
    so quit before the quarrel breaks out.
Proverbs 17:14

Sometimes, I go too quickly to "fix it" mode. 
Where I jump in the middle and try to get to the root of the problem .
And if I'm being honest, sometimes that really just makes things worse.

 Whoever restrains his words has knowledge,
    and he who has a cool spirit is a man of understanding.
 Even a fool who keeps silent is considered wise;
    when he closes his lips, he is deemed intelligent.
Proverbs 17:27-28

Does this mean I'll never help out with functions/events or with a need from a friend?

No! But it means that I'll need to be ok to say "let me check my schedule to make sure I don't overwhelm myself!"

Does this mean that I will ONLY hang out with my dearest hubby?

No! But I will most definitely make sure that his love language is being met before I fly away with the wind.  

Does this mean I will never try to fix a quarrel or misunderstanding?

Nope! But I will pray before I speak and make sure I'm not speaking out of anger or frustration.  

Does this mean I won't fight for what my faith means to me?

Most definitely not! But I will be sure to speak with grace when I'm speaking about my Savior.  

But you can still love on em' all like crazy! 
miscellany monday at lowercase letters


  1. Replies
    1. Thanks my friend! That means a lot coming from you! Your articles inspired me to write again!